Do you know something, people are always telling me how some people have just terrible customers skills but you know what I think it's the customers with the bad skills.

It's like whenever I talk to a customer I have to e someone else. not me. I have to so careful about what I say or do because we wouldn't want the poor customer to be offended, or heaven forbid they should have to wait. Le gasp. when did customer service take over quality. I want quality back, not fucking customer service. I want people not robots and actors.

Customer service is a con game. It's just a way to get people to pay more for a crappy product.

mrr.

I didn't like working today. XP

But I swear I like it most of the time, no joke. It's a actually a good job.

I don't really know what I'm trying to say. to be honest I'm probably just going to sound disconnected and I'm going to probably go all over the place.

I just think that I'm figuring some things out, or at least, I already figured them out but I'm meeting people who think the same

and at the same time, I don't know I'm meeting people who are completed close minded! and can only have faith in their set factual beliefs.

I have to admit that both fascinate me. I haven't been told my beliefs. I wasn't trained in them like many other religions. I've been trying to read up on a few different religions and/or beliefs, ideas about our cultures and societies too. and to find other people who think the same is so awesome to me. How else to explain it? What would you do if you came up with something completely new to you and you'd never heard it before to hear it come from books and other people's mouths, people you never really knew before? It's just odd! and lately I've been surprised a lot.

Today this regular of pirks coffee, where I work, came in and talked to me about what people like and religion. He said that he thinks that people can like anything. He said that a person who only likes potatoes and chicken and only eats that for his whole life is not as rich as the person who tries anything. Their life isn't as fullfilling.

Now on one level I agreed. I sort of understood what he was saying, but at the same time I thought of something a bit more specific and better.

see because he thinks that people should like everything and anything. and I disagree. I think we should try everything. There's a difference. I think that trying everything makes your life fullfilling, but you should have things you like.


I think I just told him that, life wouldn't be full filling if everyone liked everything. We wouldn't have different cultures. I think we should understand each other and participate in other cultures as well as try different foods and music and dancing, but as much as I try different things, there are things that I don't like. shrug. that's how it is. but idk. who really knows right?

but so we talked about religion. and I figured something out that I think, now mind you I don't know anything just like everyone else.I don't care what religion you're from, you still know as much as I do. and I think that religions are simply different ways of believing in the same god. do I have proof anyone might ask. hell no. why because there is none. bible? quran?(speling? someone help me out) torah? what do they all have in common, people told them that they were somehow god's word. PEOPLE. I don't know anything. I feel and I do. I try to help people with what i've got, and i live my life. I enjoy it but I do my best to not trample on others to get there.

but another point on religion. I think that religion should have faith but room for human error. Humans have told us what we know about god, and years ago. but even so, say God talked to you, how do you know it's really him? You can just feel it? that's not good enough for me. maybe it is God, but you still have to be careful with what you're told.

also how many different versions are there of the bible? does anyone actually know? I don't I just know there's a lot of different versions. Why put so much faith in something that is so unstable? but I don't know enough about the torah or the quran either so possibly they have that same flaw and possibly they don't. I'm not saying just write them all off, they each still have something to say, but to put all of our faith and trust, and to base our rules and MORALS off of them? that doesn't strike anyone as odd? we can learn from them, but we should use our GOD given intelligence. we should actually think about what we're following so closely just because we're told to. We should be rational and emotional in our thinking. we shouldn't just follow blindly and I really hope I have not offended anyone because I am not saying that people who follow any of these religions do just that, many people study a religion thoroughly before committing to it, and I am not at all saying religion is bad, I just think that using common sense with it is wise. don't just do what you're told. Religion is being told what to do. Having a relationship with God, spirituality, those are figuring things out yourself, thinking, feeling, using what's already there, and throwing yourself into the mix as well.

Ah religion, the debates that I hope to start! I seriously love hearing about other people's religions though, whether they follow God or a religion, I find it fascinating!

hmm, this seems long. I want to talk about american culture too, but maybe a different time. or if someone else wants to start something along those lines in the comments I beg you to do so! I'm curious person and greedy for knowledge, information, opinions, ideas, theories, and beliefs! anything please and thank you!

oh and thank you for listening to my shitty and incomplete opinions and BELIEFS as in not truths.

I love my parents. I was going to rant about them, but I think I'll just talk to you in person Jen and get your opinion. My parents are good people and sometimes that's all that should matter right?

Besides, I don't think I want to put one more rant up you know?

It seems like there are enough problems in the world. People have enough problems of their own to deal with without having other people's shit dumped on them too. I can just picture this tiny girl staggering under the weight of all her books only to have a few sadfaced people walk by and add a couple more books to the pile.

Sympathy is an interesting thing isn't it? I don't mind giving a little away. A little here a little there, but to give so much away. It is tiring. It doesn't always feel like giving then, it feels more like it's being taken.

I complain a lot, but you know I try to laugh about it. It doesn't really matter in the scheme of things anyway right? plus you need unhappiness to be happy. Ha. Try telling that to the unhappy person.

I have a very easy life though. I made it that way. I refuse to work away a life that already seems so unimportant. Wouldn't working notstop, killing myself over it, be pointless? to me. but some people like work.

I like work. I like my job, even though I hate it. It's something to do sometimes and it makes not working so much better.

I bring a lot of my problems on myself too. Much like anyone. maybe worse. . . . probably worse. XP I forget to wear my brace at work and then half to bite my tongue when I want to say owe. It's kind of funny, no?

I avoid problems. I avoid confrontation, and yet, Jen and Pike have helped me to be constructive about it. It doesn't work with anyone but them I've noticed. T-T I avoid confrontation. but I've only tried on a tiny few people. so I shouldn't generalize that, but will keep it up all the same.

Is this long? I can't tell. Should I put this up? What would Jen do? she'd probably point out all of the silliness in this rant, so I'll put it up. The only way to find out what I'm saying.

do you ever think about thinking? I try to. I try to think about how I think about a situation and what I'm aiming for is this, In every situation I try to think about what I could have done better, but why something happened the way it did. Example: I'm pissed, I say something mean or not true back to said person who pissed me off, I can always find out why maybe I blew the situation out of proportions, but at the same time, something still ticked me off, there was a reason for my getting angry. I didn't just magically decide to be pissed.. . well maybe sometimes, but my point is that it's that never ending thing called a balance. It's always two people.

I try to think like that. key word there anyone, try.

I never feel like I'm doing good enough. Not for me and not for anyone else. Now I swear to god if anyone jumps on that in an oh gee pam that's terrible I might have to hit them. I don't mean it in a sad way or anything. It's just how it is. It's that sort of being tugged in both directions scenario. again lol.

I overthink things.

Is it fair to treat others exactly as they treat you?

I should answer no. I should but I can't say that I'd follow my own answer. Does that make me a terrible person? Better do I care anymore? I don't hurt anyone and I do my best to love them. I love my friends and family for who they are. I have favorites, people I talk to most, people I trust the most, but is that so bad? I don't go out of my way to hurt people. I try to be friendly if not polite at least, and I try to enjoy what comes my way, I'm trying to make the most of everything. And I'd like to mark that down as a success so far, not like I'm happy all the time, just a lot of the time.

But god knows I'm far from perfect. I complain ALL the time. Trying to stop. I think for once I'm actually getting somewhere too. but just being a live means you trample on others. You'll never be able to make everyone happy, the most you can do is your best right? (cough cheezy) WHO SAID THAT? >

well that's it, hope someone read it. hope you weren't all bored to tears. God wouldn't that suck? A comment like "You suck, god just shut up and never put a rant up again" I be all like T-T. kay.

I am so excited. OwO I finally get to give Jen her presents for her b-day and then come monday I get to give Neal his present. it makes me happy inside.

Okay so I have some awesome pet peeves and here they are.

1. when people talk too much and don't let the other person talk
2. When people don't actually listen to what your saying, they're just waiting to say what
they want to say.
3. When my brother says shit about me or my sister to my parents and they just let him.
4. my brother is actually just a pet peeve of mine.
5. when I get reprimanded for doing something, but someone else gets away with it and not
only that, but simply gets to do it, no strings attached, everyone is just perfectly fine
with it.
6. when someone talks down to me, condescendingly
7. When someone tells me that I'm too fucking young to have knee pains. >
8. When older people think that they know everything, or that they are somehow ridiculously
smart, simply because they've had experience, so in other words they think they're
smarter because they're older and in reality experience isn't enough.
9. When someone tells me that they KNOW something about me even though they've met me maybe
twice. >
10. when people think that everyone is the same, or when people stereotype basically.
11. and last but not least, in fact probably one of my biggest ones, is when people go to
extremes all too often. BALANCE!!! when people don't realize that almost everything in
life should balance. take our culture for instance. just think about it. It always has
to be extreme!!! >:d
let me warn everyone, don't read the rest! trust me, it's ranty, has no flow, and there's a lot! don't do it! I'm just ranting!!! I swear you don't want to waste your time!!!!! so please just turn back now!

okay and today my last but not least wonderful bit of info, I was upstairs today in my room, right next to my brother's room where my parents were cleaning his room, yes his room, you heard right, and all I heard was him bitching at my parents and making them do everything, and not only that but a few times he made nasty comments about me and madeline, with me in the next room ,both doors open, and my parents said nothing. NOTHING! he was a complete asshole and they didn't say a word. > I really felt like telling them exactly who I've become right there. I just wanted to well, hem, say something that I shouldn't, and whip out a wiccan book and be all like hey guess what your little girl is into, that's right wiccan and paganism and guess what they're not nearly as bad as, gee, go figure, the catholic church and other religions made them out to be, inface they're actually really cool! they think that people need to be selfish and selfless. Again with balance. wow, weird, finally I found something like that but I like it for a bunch of reasons and am definitely thinking of going into it. I believe every religion is right at least to some degree but I like this one best for now, and I'd tell them I love smoking cigars! Yeah that's right they're tasty! and then I'd tell them a whole bunch of other things that they don't want to know and be like, and you know what, I think I'm doing just fine with my life. I'm actually happy with who I'm becoming for once! Never before! but now I actually like where I am. I have a fantastic boyfriend, I dress the way I want to, and I actually am openminded to other religions. I like how my life is going. I've also actually grown a spine. I actually stick up for myself and say what I need to, what I feel, and what's on my mind.

and the last thing I want to complain about is that they think I'm not a very good daughter because I'm not home all of the time or something like that, and you know what, why would I want to be for one, my brother's a dick and they do nothing about it and they all talk about me behind my back as if we're still little kiddies in highschool! so there's that and then are you kidding me! I don't do anything wrong. I don't hurt people, I don't go out of my way to be mean infact I pride myself on trying to be nice to everyone, unless they truly warrant my disfavor (XP) I do my best to make presents for my friend and I like doing favors for people that I don't know, or may never meet. I like leaving large tips when I can and I don't know. I'd like to think that I'm not a bad person. I may not be perfect, but I've kind of accepted that. I'll never be perfect and I think that there's always room to grow, but I'm still doing my best and I think i'm doing ok. so there! XP kay.

I know this is all ranty and I know people are going to say things, and that's good because I know there's a ton there that I didn't explain well, but I was just ranting so if anyone wants to know something, or have something better explained feel free to ask. sorry for those of you poor suckers who actually read that peice of crap. ^ ^ and thank you!